Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Mid Life Assessment

This section used to have an incomplete blog about myself...May be I realized that I was not doing justice to the title...and started to write a fairy tale type of a story...but now, I realized that I should be as ruthless and stringent as I am even while assessing myself...so deleted the previous content and am working on the one which actually suites my and my style...so don't panic...you guys will get to know me very soon...

To be continued...

Monday, September 15, 2008

Hey Shivani...Happy Wedding

Marriages they say are made in heaven…whereas friends like pearls are picked and chosen.

Wow…what a line to think of? And how candidly it does not suite me and my life?

Well, I took a decision of not getting married in my entire life as it will otherwise distract me from achieving my life goals. No questions please! I can’t reason it at least in a blog dedicated to something else. For that matter, I was way far from my so called friends too. And since past few years, I have stopped making friendly or personal relationships fearing damages to my professional life. After all I know, I can be the best professional of my corporate ecosystem but would be worst in handling personal aspects of life. Now that’s what I call – SELF AWARENESS…he he he…

It’s been sixteen years in which I attended only four marriage ceremonies. And that’s what I call – TRACK RECORD…he he he…Ask my past friends who were my best of the best buddies during college days and they would utter only these words …”Kutta…Kameena…Saala ek hi reason detaa hai hardam…CHHUTTI NAHI MILI OFFICE SE…” Sishir, Praveen, Tushar, Meghna, Zohra and lately Sharique bhai…for all of you, I can only say one word…SORRY…and on the top of it, I expect forgiveness from all of you too…he he he

My colleagues at IBM used to taapofy her when she used to work with ABN Amro. Both our offices were situated in the same building…Cyber-green Towers. And guess what; never in my dreams did I think that she would work with me in Genpact in the same team. And above all, when I told my IBM colleagues an year ago that I would be reporting to her as she would be my Assistant Manager, they felt sorry for me and said…Teri to lag gayi beta…he he he…

But no…I was not in the gang who used to taapofy her and above all; when she joined Genpact she could not recognize me too…Bach gayaa…warnaa gayaa thaa baaraa ke bhaav se…he he he…then started a journey called…WORK @ GENPACT.

Somehow, both our images got nurtured with many distinguishing characteristics as we both worked very differently. Our mode of execution never met each other as we both had completely opposite persona. She was an expert in building professional relationships with a blend of casual and friendly touch. However, ask my colleagues @ Genpact, and they would say… Rishi does not even know how to laugh…he he he…

Without discussing with each other, we both drew lines for ourselves which we never crossed, thereby avoiding conflicting situations. And that’s how a Management Trainee and an Assistant Manager spent a year @ Genpact…

Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the evening of September 10, 2008 at Tivoli Gardens. An evening full of small gestures…which crafted moments, as big as life.

Following my track record, I could have easily avoided my presence at Tivoli Gardens as it was the first day of our monthly Investment Performance Evaluation exercise in my office. Nobody would have questioned my absence when she was celebrating her Big Day. However, I failed to forget that I promised her my presence when she would be getting married to Mukul at Tivoli Gardens. And believe me, it was not even a promise. When she met with me last time in the office I just made a casual statement that I would be present during her marriage. Many a times I make such casual commitments without actually fulfilling them…he he he…and this time too, I didn’t make any exception…he he he

However, on the day of her marriage, I don’t know what forced me to write an SMS to Navneet, my Manager, requesting three hours permission to attend her marriage. Accordingly, I got a card & a gift for her and booked a cab too…and everything happened in just an hour’s time. I still didn’t believe that I would be breaking my so called TRACK RECORD, which I did not do even for my best of the best buddies. Well…there is always a first time for everything…he he he

At exactly 8:00 PM, I left my office to CROSS THE ROAD…he he he…actually the cab was waiting for me on the other side of the road…I reached Tivoli at about 8:45 PM thinking that I am well on time. So I asked the driver to pick me up at about 10:00 PM for dropping me back to the office. But hey, what was that? I saw all the arrangements made for her marriage, but where were the people? He he he…the function was supposed to start at 8.00 PM. When I tried to enquire with the local staff of Tivoli, they said…Sirji, this is India…he he he…I immediately wrote an SMS to Navneet, that I am the first guest to reach the place…he he he…even today, I am confused whether I was on time or before time…he he he.

Well, I had no option but to wait for the bride & the groom and the public to turn up to start the function…so I decided to sit and wait in the lobby. The sofa was cushy and I had nothing to do…so was feeling sleepy. Suddenly, a tall white handsome Uncle came and sat in front of me. After some time, he asked, “So Rishi, you are Shivani’s colleague…right?” It was the biggest shock of my life…I was completely astonished as I never saw this man in my life. I replied, “Yes sir, we are colleagues. But, sorry, I could not recognize you?” He introduced himself as GOD. What a joke…when I was about to laugh, he said, “You can call me Bhagwaan Singh, or simply Bhagwaan. And I can tell you everything”.

Wasn’t that strange?... I felt that person interesting…he asked me about my wife…to which I replied, ”I am still single and not ready to mingle”.

God : “Why?”

I : “I somehow feel that partners make me weak. So I don’t make any.”

God : “Let me ask you few simple questions…why do you think Shivani is getting married?”

I : “Well, the question should be asked to Shivani? I am just attending her marriage?”

God : “Why do you think you are attending Shivani’s marriage?”

I : “Well we are good friends, that’s why?”

God : “Really, are you a good friend of Shivani?”

And I was speechless…

God : “Rishi, you can’t be a good friend of Shivani…look at her…she is full of life and has chosen her partner…and look at you…you are almost alone in life fearing to choose partners. Forget about Shivani, you can’t be a friend of anyone. You still have time to mend yourself…think over it”

I was again speechless…I could not gather courage to take it further in asking as to how he knew my name. He smiled and went away. I was still in the same confusing emotion…as to what was that?...he he he

THANK GOD, I saw Shivani coming in a red saree along with few other people. I got off from the sofa, stood up and waited for her to see me. After about few minutes, when she glanced around, she was completely astonished to see me. We both nodded our heads to greet each other non-verbally. And I can bet, that she wasn’t expecting at-least me in her wedding. And my presence really made her feel good. It was all on her face which I got to know within a fraction of a second. And it was for the first time, I made her feel good about our alliance.

I again sat on the sofa thinking that the function would still take another half an hour to start. After about five minutes, a beautiful lady in lush green saree approached me. In a mellifluous voice, she asked me, “Are you Shivani’s colleague, Rishi?”

Now after that GODLY experience, I thought may be now it’s time for me to experience “Alice in Wonderland.”…he he he. Thinking that she might be a Tivoli Staff, I nodded my head assertively. She replied, “Please come along with me…Shivani wants to meet you. I am her mother.”…….Hooooooooooooooooooooooo…I wasn’t on my toes.

“Oh! Namaste Auntyji”, I said. This time, she nodded her head assertively and we both walked towards the exquisite bride - Shivani, who was sitting on the other side of the lobby along with her relatives.

Shivani : “Hi Rishi! I am so happy you came. “

I : “Hi Shivani! I already committed you that I would be present in your marriage. By the way, “HAPPY WEDDING”.

Shivani : “Thanks a lot Rishi. See as usual, you are so punctual. You are here on time. And look at us…it’s my marriage and everything has been so delayed, I am so sorry to keep you waiting.”

I : “No no…it’s OK, No problems. Shivani, you know what, you are looking VERY PRETTY in this red saari. Just one thing is missing”

Shivani : “really, what’s that?”

I : “Aapne Genpact ka ID card nahi lagaayaa…he he he”

And all of us started laughing. I don’t know whether my humor had an impact or not, but then it made all of us feel good. She then introduced me to all her family members. I met her Mom, younger sisters, cousins, uncle and aunty and she also showed me her brother who was busy interacting with Tivoli staff at a distance.

I then asked her to carry on with her regular preparation, as she was getting ready for the function. She smiled and I went back to the same place where I was sitting.

When I reached there, I saw my Gift that I kept on the table in-front of the sofa. A greeting card was enveloped over the gift pack on which I clearly wrote, “To Shivani…From Rishi Gajbhiye (Genpact)”. That was the moment when I realized the magical power of GOD whom I interacted with”…he he he…Now I was sure that the person whom I interacted might not be a GOD but was GODLY enough to show me the importance of adding happiness to others life…And I am glad, with Shivani, I did that…I am glad to break my so called Track Record here…

After some time, in the marriage hall, I met with my fellow colleagues who also attended the ceremony. When I moved out of the marriage hall, for a natures call, I saw the cameraman asking Shivani to walk slowly by looking straight in the camera…Now I felt like playing a prank…I stood behind the camera, and when Shivani was trying to see in the camera, she could see me well behind it. I acted like a monkey, teasing her and she could not control laughing at that instance…and it was well captured in the video camera too…he he he…and she was trying her best to walk as slow as possible, I insisted her to take BabySteps to give a perfect shot…he he he…everyone was controlling their laugh as the video was on and even Rishi was on…he he he…

After some time, the Bride and the Groom were on stage. I quickly grabbed Shyam’s camera and snapped the beauty both of them shared over the stage. When I went to the stage to meet her, she was like a regular herself…bumpy, chumpy, chirpy and bubbly Shivani…he he he…I met with Mukul, gave both of them the gift, and then felt shy to pose for snaps. Shivani knew that I generally don’t feel comfortable in posing for snaps, especially for those cameras that I don’t know much about. She experienced it during our US trip, so this time…she requested…”Rishi please please please…one snap naa…” and I felt like…being respected…so posed and got snapped along with the bride and the groom. While leaving the stage, I said, “Agli OJT me fir milenge…he he he…this time in California…”and we all laughed again…

The moment I walked down the stage, I met Shivani’s Mom once again…this time, she reminded me to take dinner…and asked about Navneet. I informed her that Navneet had some business commitments…so she could not come along with us…

Well, I was really late, so felt like skipping dinner. After all official commitments are on my top priority list always…he he he…so I immediately called my cab driver and instructed him to pick me up from the main entrance…I met with all my colleagues and rushed to the entrance…when I boarded the cab, I heard someone shouting, “Rishi…Rishi”…so I instructed the cab driver to stop the car…what a surprise, I again met GOD…he he he

God : “Hey Rishi…sorry for everything…I was just trying to strike a conversation with you as I thought you were getting bored and sleepy in the lobby.”

I : “It’s ok Sir, I know you saw my name written on the gift pack and hence addressed me with my name. Isn’t it?

God : “Oh yes…but I still feel that you are quite lonely and you should give me business…by getting married…”

I : “Excuse me…I didn’t get that…”

God : “I am Bhagwaan Singh, General Manager Tivoli Gardens…”

I : “Oh…I see…I am so sorry that I would still not be able to give you business…because I still feel that I would remain bachelor throughout my life…he he he…but see, I am not lonely anymore…I made a friend few minutes ago…her name is Shivani and I promise you Mr. God, that I would try my best to add small small happiness to all my buddies life too, atleast after my office hours…that ways, I would cultivate and harvest good friendship…which I lost somehow during my corporate marathon…he he he”

God : “I would still be optimistic for your business Rishi…you take care…hope to see you again…”

I : “Goodbye Mr. God. Take care”

Seeing God smiling at me, I boarded the cab, thereby cherishing the entire experience that happened with me in past few hours. May be I understood that my choice of not getting married should not become a reason to remain absent from events / marriages that could otherwise make my friends happy…

It’s only by GIVING…one actually TAKES respect…

The next day, I called all my friends to check who is getting married and when…he he he

And guess what did I do this weekend? I pulled my SlamBook and felt nostalgic about each of my buddies…who missed me a lot. In my Slambook I found this poetic masterpiece…

Marriages, they say…are made in heaven,
whereas friends, like pearls are picked and chosen…
Yet blessed are those who possess a friend,
who is steadfast and sincere till the end.

Friends are those who extend a hand
When you are sinking into deep quicksand…
Friends are like candles burning bright,
Taking care of you, with their guiding light.

Friends are those, who like glue stick
through times that are thin and thick…
Friends are those who willingly share
Both mirth and misery with equal care.

Friends are those who lend a ear
To hear your anguish & bring you cheer…
Friends are those who lend their shoulder
In times of distress to make you bolder.

Showers and flowers,
seldom last for hours ever,
Friendship has such a power,
which never fades and lasts forever…

I thank you God…and I thank you Shivani…I am no-more lonely…

Although I am married to my corporate ambitions, I am happy that all my friends are back in my life…atleast through phone calls, SMS's and internet.