Spoon of Sugar

It was a dark rainy day of 2002, when I was struck in the Poonam Chambers, a local mall, still situated in one of the posh areas of Nagpur. Since I had nothing to do, I just entered in one of the showrooms which used to retail luxury shirts from “Van Heusen”. With Chappals on my feet and unshaved beard on my face, I was completely a misfit in that AC showroom. The Friday collection showcase, in the showroom had a navy blue shirt which attracted me and I finally dared to pick it up in my hands.

“Hi Rishi” said a passer by and I was slightly astonished to notice him…although I could not recognize him, I still knew that person. I said, “I am sorry, I couldn’t recognize you”. He introduced himself as Parikshit, one of my juniors at SEARCH International, where I took my coaching for clearing MBA entrances.

He said, “Sir, you might be on a hometown visit….right? I am sure you might be enjoying your MBA from IBS…” I plainly smiled at him saying nothing.

He introduced me to his girlfriend…”Archana, meet Rishi Sir…he was my senior at SEARCH…and the only one from our Coaching Institute who managed to get an admission at the top 12 B-School in India…I want to be like him…I consider him my role model.”

That was the moment, when it hit me really hard…and my soul was completely shattered…I still don’t remember what interaction we had thereafter for another few minutes, as my mind was completely out of consciousness…

After some time I regained myself. The salesman in the showroom asked me, if I would like to buy the shirt which I was holding in my hands. When I denied, he forcibly grabbed the shirt and placed it in the showcase murmuring, “why do people even enter this showroom, when they don’t have a big pocket to buy stuffs.” He literally asked me to walk out of the showroom…believe me that was another shock which I could not bear…

It was still raining and I was not in a mood to go home with a sad mind…all I wanted was aloofness…I peeped into Haldiram’s Piccadilly…as usual, people were hardly present there…my next big challenge was Rs 12/- the actual cost of the coffee…and to my surprise, I had few coins which totaled to Rs 16/-. So I ordered a regular coffee and owned a corner seat for next few hours…closing my eyes…

I was trying to demystify what went wrong with me…whether it was my casual attitude towards life, or lack of awareness or may be the absence of an elder brother or mentor who could have guided me during my college days…and would have motivated me sufficiently to be serious with my studies. Perhaps, I would have had an intellectual friend circle, or would have possessed a razor sharp mind…Alas, I had nothing…I was just an ordinary average student during my college days and above all, I had developed a sense of pride in making fun of education and keeping myself aloof from it…That was the only reason why I could not secure 50% marks in my graduation, which led to the cancellation of my provisional admission, which I took, for the prestigious MBA program from the Icfai’an Business School (IBS), Hyderabad.

“How much sugar do you want in your coffee sir?” asked the waiter, and I was back to the real world.

I said “sufficient.”

To which he said, “One spoon or two?”

I was slightly irritated, so I yelled at him, “Don’t you know what a sufficient quantity of sugar would be for a cup of coffee?”

He explained, “Sufficient is a word which comes differently to different people. For some, one spoon is sufficient, but for few, even three spoons are less”

I said “one might be sufficient for me…if I would need more, I would ask for it”. He smiled and added a spoon of sugar in the cup, served the coffee and went away. Probably that was the moment, when I learnt what objectivity was all about. To my dismay, I realized how subjective, life was for me, which had already caused serious injuries to my future.

After getting theoretically convinced by Mr. Srinivasan Rao, the Coach at SEARCH International, I toiled days and nights to clear CAT, the mother of MBA entrances in India. But that happened only during my final year of graduation. Till that time, I already lost the opportunity to contribute enough grades so as to obtain an aggregate of 50% in all three years collectively. And when I was in Hyderabad, at IBS, I never thought that destiny had some other plans for me. After spending two months among the bright of the brightest people from different parts of the country, I got a message that I secured only 49% marks in my graduation. Since I could not meet the eligibility criteria, which was 'Graduation with 50% marks', my admission got cancelled and I was again at the zero level of my life. For the first time in life, I came to realize how important each single drop is, to collectively form an ocean…

Today I can not drink a cup of coffee which does not have at least two spoons of sugar, however, at Haldiram’s Piccadilly, I didn’t ask for more sugar…may be I realized that sweetness of my life has already evaporated…completely. I paid the bill and moved on in life…

Since, all the premier B-Schools have the same eligibility criteria, I never attempted for MBA again. And I never intended to do MBA from any mediocre B-School. However, I reworked my thoughts, personality and ways to live life. I shuffled and reshuffled many things thereafter so that a corporate professional should actually germinate within me…and believe me…it was not an easy task. Consciously or accidentally, I reshuffled the B and S from IBS Hyderabad…just to obtain ISB Hyderabad. May be my fate wanted me to exercise shuffling and reshuffling to carve my own destiny.

Today I nurture an aspiration to get my life transitioned from ISB Hyderabad…which is one of the top 20 B-Schools throughout the globe...

No matter which ‘Zodiac’ Shirt do I wear today in my day to day life, I would still consider myself ‘A Failure’, till the time I actually get myself admitted into ISB Hyderabad…